The Word That Started It All

Fifteen years ago, I left my high school Alma Mater full of hopes and dreams. I was then a young vibrant teenager full of confidence that I felt like I was holding the world in my hands. I was then happy go lucky, and yes, for me everything goes. Suddenly, my world fell apart when I got pregnant during my junior year. I was suddenly helpless, not knowing what to do. How can I tell my parents about it? I was the eldest and they expect much from me. And the worst part was, my boyfriend left me for another woman. I felt like I was carrying the heaviest burden on earth. My dear Father cried when he learned that I got pregnant out of wedlock. This was the time when I realized how big my mistake was. For years, I carried with me the hatred to the man who abandoned his responsibility that all I could only think was revenge. In my mind, I killed him and his mistress thousands of times more. I lived my life each day with pain, bitterness, hatred and regrets. People had condemned me for what I did, bad things had been said against me by some close friends and relatives as well which made me realized that I had to do something good with my life to prove to them that its okay to make mistakes.

Few years after I gave birth, I was able to graduate from college with the help of my parents and some very understanding relatives who never left my side during those tumultuos phase of my life. With the diploma on hand, now I was more confident that I will succeed. I went to Manila to look for work and luckily after jumping from one company to another, I got my dream job. Looking back on the past chapters of my life, I could hear God saying " Look child, had you not carried that burden thirteen years ago, you wouldn't be a good daughter that you are today".

I have burned bridges, cut ties, made enemies and gathered new friends. I had heartaches, lost love, dissappointments and failures. Good things and bad things, both I had experienced. But all I can say now is that I am fulfilled. My life had finally came in full circle. I may not have the best of everything but I am happy, really happy because I know I was not a failure after all, that there is always hope for those who had fallen and stood up.